Mondays suck

Ever since I remember Mondays are the most difficult day of the week. According to the telegraph people have a hard time smiling, even that.

Motivation is quite not there, concentration is poor.  I can normally concentrate for between 45 and 1:15 h straight. But mondays I go from 30minutes to 30 minutes.

BTW, No I don't hate my job. I quite like it.
I am not a party animal either. I did not end up totally wasted .....(OK, maybe I did that 20 years ago, seriously....)

What is it? And how to fix it?

For me, there are a couple of elements. (or more like 3)

First, in general, I like to have some organization in place. Often though, I have noticed, I arrive to Mondays unprepared, with an empty to-do list and since I have a relationship with my to-do list this means I feel groundless. So , for next Monday I will try to have a minimalistic todo list both for work and personal stuff.
Second, enforce hard egdes for work. If I know that i am finishing work at 2pm because I started at 6am then that forces me to get productive. However, if I know that I have all day long... to rumiate ....or moan...or whatever distractions take over.
Mondays tends to be a day off from working out. And you know how endorphins get you going , so it might be useful to anyway do a simple non strenuous yoga routine to get the juices going. 


Lets see how it goes.  Gotta break from habitual Monday patterns or keep trying at least.

Preparation again to the Death Ride.

Death Ride is so close to my heart, at least that year in 2011 when I completed it in 8:30h or so bike time . It helped me heal in many ways and keep in shape too!
Now, 2 years later my business trips have taken  away from my bikes for a while and all the training is making me hurt.
Then I tried to rationalize this idea that riding was not fun anymore, always trying to blame something outside me. The usual behavior. Then somebody very dear to me said "How about riding to celebrate a life....yours". That is exactly what I used to say before organizing and inviting me and the whole world to this pity party.  Exercising is first and foremost and act of gratefulness . And it'd be nice if you can give your tube if somebody needs it too....... . There is no need to get anywhere, although it would be nice to finish it faster .... (hi there ego, again...)

http://www.deathride.com/photos.html

An introverts dream

Favorite restaurant, where one is known enough to be genuinely greeted but not enough to be "chit-chatted".
Favorite food, with a magazine (which does not chit-chat) , nourishing our body and our mind.
Enough light to read, but not enough so that if an acquaintance comes in you will be seen.

My darling, you are very special to me.

Once in a while you meet somebody with whom you are suddenly very close against all 'odds'.
I don't mean in love.
I mean close as sharing things you only share with yourself maybe.
Karma or Law of synchronicity or 'There are no accidents'. Whatever.



I had one of those days today.
Things arrange themselves like doors opening , it is up to us to go through.
Sono Grata.

My darling, you are very special to me.

The day I did everything against my plans.

Today nothing went as planned. But it was a very special day.
Last night stayed up late against my plans .
Got up late against my plans.
Got ready to go somewhere I had planned a month ago and when I was finally ready, it was late.Very Against my plans.
I cancelled my plans, very against my plans.
A very close friend SMS-ed me - very  unscheduled.
I met with her and spent all day  , it turned out she actually needed support and somebody to bounce ideas with.
We spent all day together - against my plans.

I am not against plans and overall, I'd like to call myself a planner.

We plan to bring certain certainty in our lives. We plan to get where we want to go. However, things are arranging themselves all the time - outside our control. We are also changing ourselves. Adaptation is key.

“It was amazing how you could get so far from where you'd planned, and yet find it was exactly were you needed to be.”
― Sarah Dessen
 “In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.”
― Dwight D. Eisenhower

The Path is closed for runners.

As my business trips to Helsinki happen pretty much anytime during the year, I am "forced" to keep my training going as much as possible. I have embraced running and I have embraced kettlebell. I have embraced anything that helps keep my endurance.

Living in California though I  have gotten used to sports outdoors, it is just the way it is because of the location, sunshine for good or bad. With this tendency to enjoy the outdoors  and my intent to embrace the fading winter in Helsinki during March - I was set  to go on a run at -14C to my favorite Park in Helsinki. Central Park.

Little did I know I would be apparently breaking the rules as the main trails were reserved for skiers only. Skiers of course knew this, I was met with blazing looks of all kinds, one lady hit me with her skiing pole, another one yelled at me something in Finnish (Thanks God I don't think Finnish I guess) . Blame it on all the running bliss, I smiled and kept on running. When we are so focused on one task , we are blind to everything else and we are blind to our own blindness it seems.

Finally a kind soul, advised me that those trails were not for runners and that skiers would be very angry, imagine angry birds, with me shall I continue to invade their territory.It was like declaring war. He advised me to go on the "other" trails which, turns out,  I could not easily find and which would end up enlarging the distance too much. Mind you I was at 3.5 hours  on my run out of fuel and water . I wisely declared end of my run.(and end of war too)

Isn't there another way to communicate your opinion dear Park visitors? I know you are local, and I am not, I know it is your country, I know I look quite different.... But blazing looks and skiing poles are not the best way , are they?

50k Bandit Trail Race - Newbie Report

Dear Legs: Thanks for holding your ground during our first 50k, I know we have not ever run a marathon, or even a half. Road or trail. This was a tall order for us but you held your ground. By-the-way you also keep me upright everyday, which I don’t take for granted anymore.

Little did I know this was going to be a tale of mistakes & more mistakes. Just like life sometimes it seems more like a continuous mistake. But as hard as those are, so is the opportunity to grow. When one door closes, another one opens. That is why flexibility is as key as discipline. Having said that I’d like to have these events full of mistakes  a bit more space out- please Dear Universe.

My view on these events has changed a bit with time, now I get satisfaction from the enjoyment of every pedal stroke, I mean every step, I mostly ride bicycles …. . It does not represent fully a play for the ego as it used to, it represents more  (at least 50%) an opportunity to stand for what I believe. What I believe is gender equality and hence, I choose endurance events where women are a definite minority. That is why I chose the 50k. What i bring to the table are my legs which are built for endurance, I am more like a workhorse, not a racehorse in sports.

Now, the story.  It all started when we joined the  run organized by Fortius/Fleet Feet  to do the first 15k miles of the race. My overall strategy is always to try to go through the magic door (or the gateless gate from a Zen point) of view in my sports, that point of not pushing too much, but not too little either, that place where my legs find a rhythm and we can endure mentally and physically . My zen motivation was crushed when we faced the first “rock climbing” part . i noticed everybody - am not exaggerating - was power walking. I am not sure why they call it power walking, I guess because your HR shows effort but you are technically walking. These were  rock boulders, single track technical. 45 minutes into this thing and trying to push can be devastating later in the race .  As Chrissie Wellington says I paid for my  immaturity and my competitiveness because I tried to run those parts but soon my body disagreed. My boyfriend was however extremely enthusiastic about this part , I wonder what on earth had I gotten myself into . During this run I saw Trey, I didn’t know how he was at that time, but he looked like a tall muscular trail runner like one of those characters from a Avatar  without the tail , yes , that tall.. I figured he could communicate with mother earth and stuff like that and the birds would bring water to him....   He had won the 50k last year I would found later that day. Because of this training run , I was able to have a wiser approach on race day. I power-walked that section. Maybe that is the one right thing on that day.  After that grueling start,  the more “standard” fireroad welcomes.   Ups , ups and downs, some rocky terrain but seemed more manageable, some areas still i power walked but not enough for my legs to notice.  I let my HR decide mostly. I am the type of person who looks mostly at my HR and time , I didn't know the miles  and didn't want to know..The magic door opened and I went through . Around 5.5 miles , Chumash  Singletrack started. . Somewhat narrow. Rock boulders. The second  part of my strategy was to pick up my speed on this part because for some reason I felt comfortable in technical singletrack and Chumash is like this for the first half at least. Must be the mountain biker in me. High concentration. Short strides. Quick feet like a cartoon. Amazingly Enough I found my good friend Erica Gratton taking pictures in the middle of Chumash.  She was kneeling down on one of those boulders snapping pictures of all of us. I prayed for her not to lose her balance (and so that I would not lose mine either). . My body was collaborating, my mind was in the right place. So far so good. Arrived to Las Llajas in full engagement, mental and physical.
After that rest top where I picked up my other flask with homemade gel, we started climbing standard singletrack but amazingly steep and long. I ran out of water. I would run out of water a total of three times. Beginner’s mistake. My boyfriend was already out of sight.  Experience in these sports is something not to be underestimated, that is why we are recommended to have A B C races, so that we learn from those. Do as i say, not as I do. Being a newbie I just based my hydration needs on the few longer runs I had done and my cycling . It didn't work that well. I was lucky enough that people around me had water and were able to share it. Endurance rewards experience. As Richard Cunningham , the moutain bike Extraordinaire would joke after, female runners run with tiny shorts and even tinier water bottles - and he pointed to his espresso coffee cup. I was carrying only a 21 onz with me. Maybe he is into something. I was also wearing my calf-sleeves-compression-stuff-that will make me faster. Well, my feet ended up swollen and had for some reason retained water, my feet look like a pregnant woman without the pregnancy. Nothing wrong with the calf-sleeves , i had not allowed my body to adjust. Finally, after coming out from Las LLajas for the second time , going through fireroad going up back to main fireroad my body settled into this slower-than-expected-pace. I could tell by my HR and my exhaustion perception. At this time, my mantra carried me through. “Kissing the earth bouncing forward , driving with the knees” . If I kiss something i dont drop my weight onto it as pounding my weight,  I was aware my body was slowing down and pushing being dehydrated was not wise. Under the heat, and with honey-based-homemade gel my digestion could not put up with more sweet, another beginners mistake. Did I say I had never ran a half or even a marathon? I should have brought something to mix it up. Overall though, my mind was calm, engaged in keep us moving but not pushing, my heart was broken as I knew this would affect my time severely.  I took it easy until the next emergency stop where I drank like 2-3 water bottles and my body came back. Running -not walking anymore - all the way to the rest stop at the top of Chumash felt good. More fireroad, my legs asked : When does the race start? . I laughed. We might as well, it is mile 25 at least. I always have these conversations with my legs, like everybody else.  The volunteers laughed at my jokes, refueled my soul and my water bottle and we continued back on the same fireroad til the “rock climbing part” only in opposite direction. I was inspired by a 80+ woman running and went down as fast as I could. Fell down trying to pass somebody, knee scraped up . Another mistake. Dusted myself off and continued. My amygdala was emitting all sort of alarms , from a very primal point of view, my body was under attack, my inner systems don’t care of it is a lion or the 50k bandit trail race threatening. Or both at the same time. Luckily I could see the finish line. A couple of women passed me. Humility grew (more) on me. Finished, 7h 15 min.

Many lessons to be learnt, but so is this journey called life too. And we all have different approaches to it, some like to take it all prepared, uber-controlled. Some will take the challenge openly freely and then risking more I believe. Now, I can say I have been on both sides and maybe the middle way is the way. Not too tight, not too loose.